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A new mom's guide to getting the sleep she needs Brooklyn NY

Until your baby is sleeping through the night, you'll need to devise strategies for making sure you get the sleep you need.

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A new baby brings immeasurable joy to a couple, but there's no question an infant takes some things away, too: namely, time and sleep. While there are some newborns who begin to sleep through the night in a matter of weeks, others will take months... or even longer. Until your baby is sleeping through the night, you'll need to devise strategies for making sure you get the sleep you need.

"The standard advice is that the mother should sleep when the baby sleeps, even when that means daytime naps," says Jodi A. Mindell, Ph.D., associate professor of psychology at St. Joseph's University in Philadelphia and author of Sleeping Through the Night: How Infants, Toddlers, and Their Parents Can Get a Good Night's Sleep (Collins). But Dr. Mindell acknowledges that in reality mothers can't just shut their brains off and sleep any time, nor can they always resist the urge to get things done when the baby is sleeping. But there are other ways for parents to be sure they're getting enough shut-eye:

  • Make sleep a priority "That means making other things less of a priority," says Dr. Mindell. "As a society we never perceive sleep as being at the top of the list, but as a parent you have to." Either let housework slide, for example, or hire someone else to do it. Ditto with gourmet dinners. "It's better to order a pizza and go to bed early than kill yourself cooking."


  • Share the nighttime duties with your partner, even if you're a nursing mother Couples often assume that because a woman is nursing she has to be the one to get up with the baby each time he cries, but that's not the case. A mother can express milk and let her partner give the baby a bottle during the night, for example. "That worked for me," says Dr. Mindell. "We used to split the night. I would pump at 9 p.m. and then go to bed, and my husband would take the next feeding. That would give me five hours of straight sleep, and then another three hours or so of interrupted sleep until 7 a.m., when we all got up."


  • Work with your family's schedule Sometimes it doesn't make sense for partners to alternate getting up with the baby. For example, if one parent is at home with the infant all day while the other must get to work early each morning, it may make sense for the at-home parent to wake up with the baby on weekday nights, and get a break on weekends. Or if one parent has the primary responsibility for nighttime care, the other can take over every third or fourth night. Figure out what works for you.


  • Don't be afraid to wake up your baby before you go to bed "There's nothing worse for parents than going to sleep every night at ten-thirty.. and having the baby wake up at eleven fifteen," says Dr. Mindell. "I recommend that before parents go to bed for the night they wake their baby up for a feeding. The babies will be groggy, but they'll feed and go right back to sleep."


  • Get help if you can Babysitters aren't only for workdays or nights out. Ask a friend or neighbor -- or hire a babysitter -- to come over to your house for a few hours in the afternoon so you can take a nap. One mother teamed up with a neighbor who had a baby the same age. The two women would take turns helping each other in the afternoon, giving the other a chance to catch up on sleep.


  • Be creative Sleep deprivation can make people pretty desperate, and mothers of newborns have devised some clever ways of dealing with their new situation. You may find that you have to go to bed much earlier in the evening than you were accustomed to, so you can wake up much earlier in the morning. Or you may find that it works to try and keep your baby up later at night, so that he sleeps a bit later the next day.


  • Be patient While lack of sleep can be daunting, new parents can take comfort in the fact that it's a temporary problem. Most children will begin sleeping through the night on their own by the time they're six months old or so. And pediatric sleep experts say that if a baby isn't sleeping through the night by age six to nine months, parents can begin "sleep training" -- steps to encourage better sleep habits -- at that time.


    • About The Author

    Beth Weinhouse is a frequent contributor to Your Baby Today. She specializes in women's and children's health issues and lives in Oxford, Mississippi with her husband and 6-year-old son.

    Featured Local Company

    Adoption Exchange Association

    (347) 365-1763
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    http://www.adoptea.org

    Founded 25 years ago, AEA is a national non-profit organization committed to the adoption of waiting children. AEA is the membership organization for Adoption Exchanges, currently serving approximately 75 member agencies across the country. AEAs members recruit permanent families for children in foster care. AEA is also the lead agency in AdoptUsKids, a Federal grant through the Childrens Bureau, to recruit adoptive families for children waiting in foster care across the United States. AEA is based in Baltimore, with some staff in remote offices across the United States. Its CEO is based in Brooklyn, NY.
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