Everyone has a picture in their mind of what an ideal family holiday should be. Usually this involves lots of family members of all ages sitting around a large table, eating, drinking, laughing and never, ever disagreeing. Unfortunately, this is somewhat unrealistic. When large groups of people gather, personality conflicts are bound to arise. This doesn't mean a ruined holiday, however. All it takes is a little forethought and a bit of tact to create an atmosphere where everyone can have fun and celebrate!
- Respect your elders (and your youngers, and even those the same age as you)! The most important rule in creating enjoyable family holidays is to treat everyone with respect. That means that when great-grandma offers you unwanted advice on disciplining your children, simply say, "Thank you for that advice." You don't need to agree with her, follow her suggestions or explain to her why you think she's wrong. You just need to remind yourself that everyone has different beliefs, and that's a good thing. It would be an awfully boring family gathering if everyone thought the same thoughts and said the same things!
- Understand that a large family gathering isn't the time for rehashing old arguments. If you have a long-running disagreement with a member of your family, do not use your extended family's Christmas party as an occasion to resolve it. Bringing up personal arguments in front of the entire family is bad form, and will only create additional animosity between you and the person with whom you don't agree. It will also make your other family members uncomfortable, and possibly ruin the gathering for everyone. Instead, put on a happy face and remember, it's Christmas - a time for peace and love! If you absolutely can't get along with someone, try to avoid being alone in the same room with them. A more acceptable solution is to arrange a time after the family celebration when you can discuss what's bothering you.
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Author: Tonya Sandersfeld