Language is central to everything in neuro linguistic programming. What you say and how you say it can change the way you relate to others. If there are people who you meet with at work or socially that you find difficult to get on with then you can use the techniques of NLP to get through these obstacles.
According to NLP the most important part of communication is to take responsibility for your own communication. You must make sure that you say clearly what you mean. You can then check that the words have been understood by the listener in the way you meant. It is by the same token important to be sure that you have understood what is being said to you
When you have problems with people in your communication NLP can structure things so that you can get your message over better and be a better manager too. One thing you need to consider early on is that you might be the problem rather than the other person. Neuro linguistic programming can show you where you have wrong thinking and beliefs about your own self. It can give you clear strategies to change the thinking in your brain and the words that you say.
You need to understand that the other person and build up a rapport with them. Do not make assumptions about them that you cannot validate. You need to establish an initial way of relating to each other. You will then be able to see what the other person's standpoint is and how they think. You can then look at building on this rapport with clear and decisive communication – and this works both ways.
Practice makes perfect and you need to use NLP review techniques to get better over time at communication. You will find that some methods work very well for you and others will simply not fit in with your character and style. The important thing is not to get so lost in all the NLP details that you forget to communicate.
Understanding where others are coming from
You need to acknowledge the worlds people come from. They will have different education, upbringing and cultural backgrounds. They will also have grown up in different environments. So it is no wonder that you need to work at your communication. You also have your own background that comes with all its own idiosyncrasies.
NLP uses tools and patterns of language to help you get through all the differences and misunderstandings. When you communicate you are not only speaking and hearing words. You use all your senses to give and hear what you are saying. So you have visual information as well as auditory input to take in. You can use NLP to do a better job of filtering the mixture of messages. Now you can also model your own speech and output on people who have better communication skills. You can use borrowed techniques to improve your own communication.
John Taylor is a Master NLP Practitioner, he writes extensively on the topic of Neuro Linguistic Programming on his blog http://TalkAboutNLP.com and in his http://NLPin30Days.com ezine. John works with individuals, teams and organisations to help them to achieve higher levels of excellence.
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